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On a more practical note: I’ve also learned to respect my observational style. And not feel the need to speak to everything. I’m trying to embrace my strength in an extroverted world (or false Awesome Crazy Tree Farm Lady Christmas Tree Merry Xmas Shirt world).. part of the whole thing is knowing who you are and learning to accept and strengthen those skills. One book that helped me understand introversion was by Susan Cain called Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking. Any response contains an abundance of new information, even if it’s just an “it’s nothing”. How someone says something (body language, enthusiasm, general vibe), even in small talk, can tell you quite a bit about them. Any kind of response builds conversational momentum. It’s an easy way to potentially kick start a conversation.

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Remember, from the extrovert’s perspective, not everyone that they ask this to is an introvert. A quiet person does not equal an introvert. They might just be quiet at this moment. They could even be Awesome Crazy Tree Farm Lady Christmas. Tree Merry Xmas Shirt extrovert that’s just not currently not comfortable with the group dynamic (i.e. some strangers can be intimidating). Of course, if you’re an introvert on the receiving end of this, from your perspective this question is 100% always directed to you from extroverts when you just want to enjoy the quiet. I can totally get how this can become very annoying. For my ultra introverted girlfriend, though, I’ll just say, “Hey, having an introverted moment?” or “do you feel like a conversation right now?” She really appreciates when I ask because she’s a bit of a people pleaser. So if I just jumped right into something she would feel conflicted. It’s So good. So happy.

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